Perspective and Wisdom

I went to see The Apostle last year. It is a movie written, directed and starring Robert Duvall. He is a minister working in Texas who finds his wife cheating on him, Duvall then hits the lover with a ball bat and runs away. He assumes a new identity and starts a new ministry in Louisiana. He reaches new heights as he lets God lead him and he willingly follows. He actually helps people build a relationship with God and no task is too small. Instead of the nice home he had in Texas, he sleeps on a couch. He gives up his nice car and works several odd jobs to earn money to refurbish an old, decaying church, his church.

If I watched this movie 10 years ago I would have said the Duvall character, The Apostle, was a chicken running from his past and a slick shyster not worth a dime. He refused to face up to his actions and he hid behind his so called ability as a minister. He is a one dimensional and an excellent characterization of Southern ministers who shout and dance and ask parishioners to answer questions or repeat words/phrases like amen. In other words, he is loud, obnoxious and dishonest.

Today it occurred to me the more the Apostle failed on a personal level, the higher he rose as a minister. He reached the people of his new church and he was a superior minister even though he had far less to work with. While he was a good minister in Texas, he followed God’s path in Louisiana and was a true servant of the Lord. It showed in his actions and his ethics. He took any job to raise money for his ministry. When he was arrested, he gave all his valuables (and he had very few) to a member of his new church. He actions spoke as loudly as his words. As life in Louisiana continues, he becomes more serene. And like most people, he is a complicated man with good and bad traits. In other words, he is a multi dimensional. I am not sure I would have realized it 10 years ago.

The reason for this note is that the movie made me reflect on perspective and wisdom. Growing older can be challenging, but one positive attribute (and I can think of several) is that if you are open minded, you may acquire wisdom. Wisdom is invaluable. Wisdom, when combined with knowledge, is a powerful pair. You learn to see actions from several different viewpoints. You look deeper than the surface. You can ask more intelligent questions or offer more impressive comments. Most importantly, you learn the value of listening as opposed to talking. For example, so many times in Sunday School I am impressed with the thoughts expressed or point of view that never occurred to me. It is really invigorating. But then, wisdom usually is.

Technology and an Old Car

I recently traveled to KY Land Between the Lakes to hike a trail. As I drove, I thought about our family car. It has 157,000 miles on it and is 10+ years old. My wife picked it out because it has a large trunk. It is a Chevy Impala and it has been a very good car.

However, I did not think about a new car because this one is old. Rather, technology has passed it by. By my count, we can have up to 5 electronic devices operating at the same time in our car. If you exclude the driver, you have my wife with her cell phone accessing the internet or processing emails (we usually listen to the radio); my son has his cell phone for texting and a separate device to listen to his music (thank God); my daughter accesses the internet or texts with her cell phone and sometimes listens to her music device (and again, thank God). I have two phones (business and personal) that I process email or access the internet. To people driving by our car on the interstate and glancing over, it must look like the passengers are praying for the driver to be careful.

You get the picture. First, traveling with all these devices is challenging given the number of chargers needed. You usually have two chargers per device (one for the car and a regular one). Fortunately, a couple of the devices use the same charger. However, consider this. We have one outlet in our car. The way my family uses these devices I am sure that determining a charging priority will soon be an issue. It is most apparent when we travel long distances. We have yet to have a major conflict, but I can see it coming. In all honesty, I am not sure my kids could live without their cell phones. What was originally purchased as a security item is now an essential lifestyle component.

My conclusion? For our next car, I have decided a major criterion is the number of charging outlets available to plug in an electronic device. GM, and other car assemblers are you listening? More importantly, do you have kids?

My Best 4th of July Ever - 2009

My best 4th of July morning started early. My daughter and I decided to walk the Paducah Greenway Trail on Friday. Given the heat index, we opted for a 7 AM departure. The trail is 3 miles long (roundtrip).

My daughter spent the night at her friend's home. She called me at 630 AM to be sure I would come get her. I got to her friend's home a little after 7 AM. She was outside waiting. We stopped and got a power drink.

We started the walk and headed down the trail. It was a beautiful morning. It was not hot and we only say three other people on the trail. The trees were green and I think we saw 5 or 6 different birds.

It has been a long time since I have been on a trail. I decided it was time to block out TVs, cell phones, internet, ect. distractions. You could hear cars on part of the trail. Most of the noise was birds singing and trees rustling in the breeze. Occassionally, you heard water running under a bridge. In short, I wanted to hear nature.

Of course I got to hear one of nature's most beautiful creatures - my daughter talked almost non-stop. As she said "Daddy, I had alot to say." I now know her favorite Mexican fast food restaurant (Taco Bell), her favorite dancers on her dance team, alot about her friends, cheerleading, gymnastics, several conversations that started with "I have a question", ect. What was most interesting to me was her observations about her dance team partners and other people. She told me which dancers she thought had really outstanding techniques. When she talked about gymnastics she noticed how good some of her friends are and the discipline exhibited. I was impressed with the way she looked at people and celebrated their accomplishments. That is a wonderful outlook and I credit her mother. Looking for the good in people is a wonderful attribute and one I hope she never loses.

Late in the morning I took my son and his friends to lunch at Steak and Shake. I should have stuck to my tried and true favoriite - Frisco burger. Sometimes exploration is not good. Anyway, James' friend from SC is here. He plays on the varisty team and is the strong safety. He is a good kid, very smart. Sometimes when I look at a smart kid (or any kid) you hope they have every opportunity to reach and exceed their potential. He has alot, I hope he achieves it. What is hard to get kids to understand is attitude is absolutely critical.

Side note, one of my son's friend talked about Iraq and the fact the country had so much internal. hatred. My son said the names of the largest sects. I was very proud of him. (If I could spell them, I would include them on this note).

Top 10 Reasons For... JUST TOO MUCH

After reading numerous articles, posts adn titles, I have concluded that I am tired of "top ten" or whatever number list or "The 5 Reasons For..." as the focus of an article. Frankly, I am less inclined to read anything with either title.

Look around, you see it all the time and more so on news websites. I suspect this in in part because readers just want to cut to the chase. For a writer, these methods allow the use of a bullet format to highlight key points and move away from an essay style. It is a far easier way to write. Sometimes I think writers use these formats because they lack facts or cannot offer any interesting analysis.

Honestly, sometimes I feel insulted. Perhaps the writer thinks I am not bright enough to count. So he will do it for me. Perhaps our social networks do not allow for much more than a list. You know, the 140 character limit. This forces people to think and write in short clips. As you have probably guessed, this had to be a note because I exceeded the Facebook character limit.

When I did oratory in high school and college, the rule/format was briefly tell the audience what you are going to tell them (introduction), tell them in great detail using stats and analysis (body), and finally briefly tell the audience what you told them (conclusion). The emphasis was on the middle section or the body. What are you saying, what do you offer to support your position, ect. At the conclusion you may sum up with noting key points by number. Writers focusing on a list or reasons have skipped straight to the conclusion- tell the audience what you told them. Most of the time I feel cheated.

I know these formats have been around for decades (or longer). It just seems to have proliferated. You can thank David Letterman, USA Today, email, texting, and Microsoft Powerpoint for a substantial increase in the use of list and reasons.

My Cell Phone and My Kids

This was posted last year on Facebook. 

 

Earlier this weekend I posted an interesting article in the most recent Time magazine by Nancy Gibbs about cell phones and kids. She basically says that the cell phone technology has advanced and kids are potentially abusing it. One example, kids are taking revealing photos of themselves and emailing it to their boyfriend/girlfriend. It really shows that kids do not understand boundaries and perhaps do not realize anything posted on the internet exist forever. Ms. Gibbs' article is an excellent read for anyone with young kids.

I thought about this. Frankly, it is a little frightening. My skills with the Microsoft Office suite is far superior to my kids. It should be, I use it every day and took classes at the technical college. For example, I know how to ask questions to find out how to do some format. That skill comes with using the system on a regular basis.

However, my cell phones are a different story. My daughter takes my cell phones (work and personal) and takes her photo, makes it the opening page and changes all of my settings. For her it is easy to change these settings. For me I have to consult a 125 page user's manual. Frankly, a 125 page user's manual speaks volumes about the complexity and potential uses of a cell phone. If I recall correclty, my first car owner manual was about 125 pages. To make matters even worse, my kids have friends they can ask about use of cell phones. I don't.

Perhaps it is because my kids view their cell phone more than an emergency telephone. When we gave our kids their first cell phone it was for them to call us due to an emergency. Both kids had activities held at locations that did not have a standard phone. So if theater rehearsal or dance got out early or ran late, they could call us. It quickly evolved from a cell phone to a comprehensive communications device. Every time a cell phone contract expires, the kids are looking at what they want a cell phone to do. For example, I had the best cell phone in the family. My kids used to complain that I knew less about all the services available than anyone else in our family. My daughter constantly showed me things about my phone that I never knew existed. (yes, I did not read the user manual) They may have a point.

In one respect, I admire their curiosity. I am impressed that they ask how can I make this phone do what I need or want it to do. For several days after they got their first cell phones we would have conversations that started wtih "Did you know the cell phone can do..." My son taught me how to text. My daughter's friend taught my wife how to email photos. We have texting because my son convinced me how it is valuable. He clearly stated why he wanted it and how he would use it. He is right, texting does serve a unique purpose.

Their curiousity extends beyond cell phone use. Any Facebook question I have, I ask my son or daughter. If you want to know what the icons mean and what else can be done, just ask them.

Facebook and cell phones are different. With Facebook I can see who they are communicating with on a daily basis. Even when the kids access the internet, I can back track and see where they have been. Cell phones are much different. Since my kids always have their cell phone with them, it is diffiicult to see anything - photos or text messages. When the subject is brought up my kids give me the same response - don't you trust us? Yes I do, but you do not have the experience or wisdom to necessarily know when boundaries are violated.

This reminds me of the evolution of cable TV. When I was about my kids age cable came to Midland, TX. At first, it was just news or reruns of shows done in the 50s and 60s. Parents knew these were harmless shows. Much like cell phones today, cable TV evolved. New stations were created with original programming. Now, parents have to watch the shows their kids watch. It is original programming and not always appropriate for children. Comedy Central and MTV are two channels that come to mind. In this respect it is even worse - my kids would go to their friends homes and watch shows we would forbid.

What is the point - like cable TV today, I must take time to learn more about cell phone use. It is up to me to ensure that my kids do not intentionally or unintentionally abuse their phones. I am most concerned about unintentional abuse.

Finally, if you find spelling errors, please accept my apologies. I have not figured out how to make the print larger- another Facebook question for my kids.

My Daughter's Dance Competition

Reflections on my daughter's dance competition. This was posted last year. I attended my daughter's dance competition last year. The determination and effort of every kid is impressive. You can tell the dancers are very dedicated and take dance seriously. It is more than a hobby, it is a real passion. In fact, if my daughter is typical, these are highly disciplined kids.

My favorite part is after a phase of the dance competition ends and before the awards ceremony. They play music and all the kids on the stage dance, it is fun to watch.

You want every kid to do well. It is tense before my daughter's award is announced. She was actually shocked by the first one, I must admit so was I.

You see many creative costumes and unique dances. A couple of the modern dances are interesting. Two of the group dances were outstanding, staying together must take alot of practice. It makes me all the more anxious to attend her future competitions.

1st Blog

Welcome.  This is my first blog on my blog. I Tweet, update Facebook, and LinkedIn regularly.  This will be used to post essays and posts that exceed 140 charactors.  It is a start.