Potential Boyfriend Questionnaire

(and I use the term "boyfriend" loosely)

For all fathers with daughters who have boys interested in her.  Feel free to add or revise this questionnaire as needed.  

Peggy Potential Boyfriend Questionnaire

Academics

What is your favorite subject? Why?

What classes do you struggle with?  What steps have you taken to improve your performance?

What is your current GPA?

Are you planning to go to college?

If so, where?  And what is your thoughts on your major?

What do you read?

 

How does a bill become a law?

Clubs

Are you a member of any clubs?

If so, what are they?

Why did you choose them?

Athletics

Do you participate in any sports?

If so, what are they?

Why did you choose them?

Do you do any additional workout above and beyond what is required by your sport?

Personal

Do you drive?

Ever been pulled over or gotten a ticket or in a wreck? If yes, please elaborate.

What are your hobbies?

Do you regularly exercise? If so, what is your routine?

Do you work now? If so what do you do and what have you learned?

What do you watch on TV?

What kind of music do you listen to?  Why?

Who are your favorite musicians?

What is or are your favorite book or books?

Do you subscribe to any periodical magazine? If so, what is it?

Favorite news source?

Who do you admire and why?

Who is your favorite sportsperson and why?

Who is or are your favorite presidents and why?

Are you a republican, democrat or independent? Why?

Have you ever shot a gun? I have.

Do you pray? If not, you may want to start to after you begin dating my daughter.

Scenario Questions

Peggy and I want to go to the symphony and you want to go out with your friends. What do you do?

Peggy and I want to go to the ballet to see Swan Lake.  You want to go party with your friends. What do you ultimately decide?

You pick Peggy up for a date.  Describe what happens as soon as you park the car at our house.

Peggy must be home at 10 PM. You and Peggy are with your friends watching a movie.  You must leave in 15 minutes to get her home on time, but the movie ends in 30 minutes. What do you do?

You say something mean to Peggy. What do you do next?

You and Peggy are driving home. Peggy will not put on her seatbelt, what do you do?

Peggy’s mother makes dinner for all of us. First, do you bring anything? Second, the roast is dry, what do you tell Peggy’s mother?

Peggy wants to go to the mall, you want to play football with your friends, what do you do?

You let Peggy pick the restaurants for dinner dates. She picks Chipotle again, for the 15^th time. What do you do?

The Redskins are playing the Cowboys and the game is tied.  With over 4 minutes left, you and Sandy are glued to the screen.  Peggy and I walk in and inform you that Downton Abbey starts now.  What do you do? (Bonus if you know what Downton Abbey is.)

You, Sandy, the Pope, Mother Theresa, President and Michelle Obama, George and Laura Bush, Peggy and I are on a plane. It is going to crash. You run to get the parachutes and find only two, what do you do?

You walk in the room, Peggy and I are discussing British Parliament as we watch it on CSPAN. What do you do? (Bonus if you know what CSPAN is and can briefly describe it).

You, Peggy and I are going to the car lot. You are buying your first car. Knowing Peggy will be in the car with you, what kind of car are you looking for?
 

It is Peggy’s birthday, what are your plans?

It is my birthday, what are your plans?

Anything else you want to tell me?

Anything else I need to know (and remember, I hate surprises).

One man I greatly admire and respect is former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld. My reason is pretty simple.  Mr. Rumsfeld embodies a true public servant.  He was elected to Congress; accepted top level jobs in various administrations, served two tours as Secretary of Defense, and was successful in the private sector as the CEO of a pharmaceutical company.

Perhaps equally important, he started compiling a list of rules back in 1974.  He periodically updated it and made it available to the public.  I keep a copy of it and refer to it often.  It reflects the wisdom of a man who experienced considerable success and took on challenges in the public and private sector.  Oddly enough, I am not aware of anyone one else in the public or private sector that compiles a list like this and generously makes it available to citizens.

One other aspect I like is when he uses a quotation; he attributes it to the source.  No small footnotes buried in the back of the document, he tells you where he got it right after the actual sentence. That probably seems minor, but as a writer and former debater, I greatly appreciate it.

You probably know most of Mr. Rumsfeld's rules. However, it is well organized and easy to read.  Some of the entries are humorous. And some are very serious. You will note on the first page the last revision was September 10, 2001. Please be sure to read Mr. Rumsfeld's introduction paragraph on the second page.

For those in the private sector, I suggest starting on page 9. On that page Mr. Rumsfeld notes lessons learned in business.  Of course his rules noted elsewhere in the attachment also apply to business.  The rules under the heading “Doing the Job in the White House” certainly apply to working in most public and private sector organizations.

 

The section titled “Life” is not his rules, but rather quotations he found over the years and covers a multitude of subjects. 

Whether you agree with Mr. Rumsfeld or not, his rules are excellent advice. The rules are written simply and the PDF is well organized. 

http://www.cornerbarpr.com/images/home/rumsfeldsrules.pdf

Greener Pastures

Jim Zumwalt, my friend and the city manager of Manassas Park, announced his retirement earlier this month. It is well deserved. Jim has been a public servant for over 40 years. 

When I think about a true public servant, I picture Jim.  He continually amazed me with his breadth and depth of knowledge and constructive ways to solve challenges. Jim definitely possesses the winning combination of intellectual curiosity, extensive experience, and wisdom. 

Give Jim a white board with different color markers and you were off to a very fast start. He loved to sketch out the problem on the white board.  Jim is not talkative, but when he speaks people at the table listen. He kept conversations focused and he dissected each challenge from a number of directions.  It was common for Jim to listen to an issue. And then watch him lead a discussion that ranged from translating it into policy and finally exploring the mechanics of implementation.  He made it look so easy and as I have seen and learned, it is very taxing and difficult.

City management loses a true professional.  He was as I wrote earlier, a public servant. And now, Jim can pursue more noble and personal interests.

http://www.cityofmanassaspark.us/index.php/news/599-city-manager-position

Employee Reviews

As a manager, you dread them. As an employee, you may feel queasy.   The event?  Employee reviews. 

When I first managed people, I approached employee reviews with some trepidation.  You are concerned that the employee may not take it seriously. Are you sure you are fair?  Are you aware of the accomplishments the employee achieved?  Can you offer constructive criticism?  Can you offer a path to the employee to help him achieve his goals?  You get the idea.

My old boss offered me the best advice I ever got on employee reviews.  At the time we could not offer any pay increase or bonus.  He suggested that I look at it as the only time during the year that you and the employee have an uninterrupted hour to discuss their goals/objectives and future.  It has served me well. 

One key point I learned as a manager is it required me to work much harder at observing and listening to employees throughout the year as opposed to an annual employee review.  It made reviews much easier and frankly, I think, more productive. 

I ran across this article a while back on employee reviews published on the Fortune blog.   This is a software program. However, it offers excellent advice and tips for managers.  These suggestions take work, but if you view employees as an asset that can grow in value, then these appeared to me as well worth the effort.

http://tech.fortune.cnn.com/2012/10/17/performance-review-software/

A Change of Venue

Earlier this week I attended the Industrial Asset Management Council (IAMC) spring forum in Charleston, SC.  You have the opportunity to network with key clients and stakeholders.  For me, it offers a way to collect intelligence, connect with contacts and friends, and think about my profession. 

Sometimes a change of venue lets you recharge and just think.  You can silence you Blackberry and/other devices.  One of my favorite ways is to take run in a new venue.

This year I tried something new.  American Electric Power sponsors a fun run. It starts at 6 AM in the morning. You can walk, run or jog. You start off as a group. As a slower runner, I was quickly left behind.  And for those who read my blog, my son is essentially correct. I do not run, I do the “old man jog.”  At this event, I realized exactly how right he was. Fortunately, my simple goal: just go farther and faster than the previous run. 

Charleston Place was the conference hotel.  I started heading south on Meeting Street, ran until I got to the White Point Garden and headed west on Murray Blvd. It was so beautiful early in the morning. The sound of the ocean gently lapping against the shore or flood wall was calming.  The city was waking up, I saw very little traffic. The smell of the ocean was a refreshing change.  The entire run both mornings put me in an excellent frame of mind for the rest of day and evening events.  The run took 45 minutes.  This is an activity I will look forward to at future IAMC forums.

A couple of pictures of my running path not taken at 6 AM.

My Life is Beeps, Buzzes, Vibrations, Etc

My son was here from college.  One night the family was enjoying dinner when I realized how many beeps and buzzes go off. My kids' smart phones beep when they got a text, Twitter or Facebook notification, and vibrate when a phone call comes in. My wife's phone buzzes and beeps when she gets a Facebook notification, a text or an email, and her phone rings when someone calls her.  My personal phone beeps once when I get a text (I do not leave my 3G on all the time) or rings when I get a phone call. My business phone buzzes when I get an email or text and rings when I get a call. 

Well, you get the idea. All these notifications can be very distracting.  And depending on what else is going on, very annoying.  It is even worse when two or more have the same notification sounds.

It is almost comical.  Imagine the constant stream of sounds and noises.  You may experience it with your family. 

Now think about all the sounds we can have at dinner or when we are all in the same room. This does not include our landline. It grows exponentially when my kids have friends over. 

All in the name of connectivity.  So we are all so connected on our devices to a bigger world. Ye we are disconnected at the dinner table or in small interpersonal groups. In fact, when I go to meetings in our office, I do not take my cell phone or iPad in an effort to minimize distractions. 

Unfortunately I do not have an answer.  Except to say I do not think it will get any easier.

You Are Not Alone...

and you do not need to be.  When I had my own business it was a lonely start. Several of my clients were in the immediate area, but my market was outside the region.  What I realize now is I may have a general understanding of several aspects of business, but access to greater expertise in several fields would have been immensely beneficial.

I read this article a while ago.  It offers valuable advice to start-ups and other entrepreneurial ventures.  The article suggests a start-up businessman seek an advisor. This is not to be confused with a mentor. A mentor is someone you would talk to about many different issues. Equally important, a mentor can be the type of business person you aspire to be.

Generally, an advisor brings a skill not possessed by the entrepreneur.  An example is marketing or accounting.  An advisor is compensated in some form, perhaps stock or some other non-cash payment.  The article also suggests an agreement be executed. 

For a start-up business man unable to form a board of directors due to time constraints, this is an excellent alternative.   It is important not to request too much time or involvement from an advisor.  Rather consider an advisor as a check on an activity you may undertake, but is unfamiliar to you.

http://under30ceo.com/how-to-add-an-advisor-to-your-startup/